Saamba

i�m baaack.

you�re disappointed, i know. saamba(him) is funnier. i accept that.

its been an interesting two months, but i think i�m finally ready to be here again�

the bad
thanks to everyone who said the kind words about the loss of my grandfather. it was a hard blow to take, but we all knew it was for the best. none of us wanted to see him suffering. and i really have been fortunate so far. at 27, he was the first grandparent i�d lost.

so, that in itself was a hard thing, but that came on the heels of my mother randomly losing her eyesight over a two-month time period. i told her to look behind the dryer, because that�s where all the random things that get lost seem to be found, but no luck. it has been doctors appointment after doctors appointment; a week in the hospital; tests, more tests and duplicate tests; but still no answers. we finally got to meet with someone who seemed to officially deserve receiving his doctor's license and he suggested some new possibilities(mind you we had to travel several hours to meet with this guy but it was worth it). now we�re playing the waiting game to see if his hypothesis is correct. i hate waiting games, especially when they involve someone i love�s eyesight and possibly me if he�s right, because its hereditary. but such is life i suppose.

i don�t think i ever really appreciated how central vision is to common vernacular� at least i didn�t until the first time saamba(him) and i took mia madre out to dinner after she got out of the hospital� it was awful, the normal conversation starter of �we saw this movie the other night� now seemed hard and callous. �the other day i was looking at�� did you read�� yep, all seemed just so completely wrong. or when she told a story about a customer who, while sitting at her desk, bent down and poked himself in the forehead with the pen that was attached to her desk� i came out and started to say �well, at least he didn�t poke himself in the eye� but �the�� trailed off and eye morphed into a very confused and embarrassed �nose?� later i found out saamba(him) was going to say the same thing, but apparently his brain filter works better than mine.

don�t get me wrong. i know its okay to still say these things, in fact, its back to normal already� but there was just something very strange about that first get together outside the hospital and trying to come to terms with it.

life is a pretty strange thing.

the good
we recently joined the ranks of people who are doing the moving thing. as of december we will no longer be living in east bumblefuck, which i am very thankful for. i don�t like bumblefuck very much, but it was where saamba(him) was living when we met� not long after that, i found myself living there too.

we found a great apartment up in our favorite town and i�m thrilled� an old brick victorian, two bedrooms, a porch, hardwood floors, high ceilings, formal dining room and a full-sized kitchen for me to cook frozen dinners-in-a-bag in. hmmm, maybe i�ll be motivated enough to learn how to make things from scratch. next stop� grilled cheese. awww, yeah.

i love the whole moving process. i love going through and getting rid of all the clutter that you gather when you stay in one place for too long. weeding everything out and packing what you haven�t thrown out� if you do it right, you should only have to pack half of what was originally in your apartment before you started the whole process� i think i was a nomad in a past life. i�d be happy moving every few months.

unrelated, i am loving new york state attorney general eliot spitzer these days. i swear, the man has done more in his time in office than the other 49 attorneys general combined. right now he is going after insurance broker marsh & mclennan. which doesn�t seem all that exciting, i�m sure, but when you write about the insurance industry for a living, its huge! the far-reaching implications, the pages and pages that can be written about who else is suing marsh and who else is getting involved, the reforms that are expected to happen because of it... i'm getting excited just thinking about it! truth be told, i should hate what he is doing, as this is bad for the industry� but damn! the journalist in me is lapping it up like a cat with warm milk. so, thank you mr. spitzer, thank you for making my job so much more interesting.

and the ugly?
not really ugly, but i seemed to have a nice ennio morricone theme, and didn�t want to ruin it.

so saamba(him) mentioned in his last entry that i bought him three books. he also mentioned i bought them out of guilt for having an affair. for the record, there�s no affair being had, well, other than the one that involves dave navarro and kate hudson when i sleep, but it doesn�t count if you�re sleeping, right? anyway�

the books. it all started because the IT guy at my office suggested the book "setting up LAMP." he�s a computer geek, saamba(him) is a closet computer geek, it seemed perfect. so i went to our local borders to pick up said book. (which, mind you, i called to make sure they had it� they had one copy, and i asked them to set it aside� and as i was giving them my info, i realized how silly i was being by asking them to set it aside� like anyone was really going to decide within the hour it would take for me to get there that they needed to know how to network linux, apache, php and the other thing whose name i�m forgetting�).

while i was there i looked at the new political releases, as saamba(him) likes those too. he has a whole collection of them that only gets read when we take vacations. i contemplated getting him another to add to his vacation collection. then i saw the jon stewart "america" text book, which is truly hilarious� check it out if you get the chance. it was political and funny and could be read in short spurts. a political book that could possibly have reading potential while we�re still on home territory� score one for the girlfriend.

book number three relates directly to the first book. as i mentioned earlier, saamba(him) is a closet computer geek, and when he gets on a computer kick, he will stay up night after night working on whatever computer thing he�s got it in his head he wants to do. i�m not a huge fan of this as it takes him away from good quality �going to bed� time. so to counter the effects �setting up LAMP� was bound to have on our relationship, i decided to balance it with �position of the day.� the next time he gives me that sheepish �mind if i stay up� grin� i�ll be able to point out the fact that �the tadpole� is much harder to do with just a vibrator� and that he�d be a much more well-rounded person if he could master the art of the �well-oiled machine� rather than connect the c: drive to the pi: drive� which is something that could be accomplished when i am at work. incentives, boys and girls, its all about the incentives.

ciao.

6 wrote to say im an idiot.